Atheist in Church

I am an Catholic-raised atheist. I was raised through 13 years of private school, which did not seem to help me at all. I did not start becoming successful in college until after I realized I was an atheist. I was agnostic until about 2 years ago when I realized that the idea of god does no one any good. I went from hoping there is a god to hoping there is not one. The idea of an self-proclaimed omnipotent, omniscient being just seems tyrannical, and the stories of Lucifer being cast down from heaven makes the devil out to be revolutionary and god out to be illogical and corrupt. A perfect being is always contradictory, and "good" and "evil" are relative.